Eurovision

What can you say? Last year had lots of excellent songs I thought. This year was utter and all-out crud. I've switched off. No way am I going to watch voting for that lot... Terry Wogan must have seen something in his tea leaves! Graham Norton did well with exactly the same formula though.

Eurovision 2008

I know it was weeks ago but we had a bit of a gig that night with the band so I didn't see it until later.

Well what a kerfuffle! So the UK came last (joint - as if that makes it somehow better...) again. But for Heaven's sake, however well Andy Abrahams sang on the night, the song was a bit of a disaster let's face it. Most of Europe put in songs with verses and a chorus and a tune you could actually hum afterwards and we put in a dog's dinner so enough wingeing already.

I love Terry Wogan's humour but saying that Bosnia Herzegovina's entry (pictured) shouldn't have got more points than the UK was way out. It was a good song. The chorus made me want to sing along (even though I couldn't because I had no idea what they were singing!) and the rather bizarre setting with the "four knitting brides of Frankenstein" and that ridiculous skirt and the washing line didn't take anything away from the song itself. I thought it could well have won. I wasn't that keen on the winning Russian song to be honest. But no matter.

None of the western European countries put in particularly strong songs. Germany fielded four girls one of whom was singing out of tune and the song was instantly forgettable. France fielded a bearded nutter who inhaled from an inflatable beach ball and and was backed by four bearded girl singers. Spain... well how do you even describe it? The song was quite catchy I suppose but then compare those against some of the others. Armenia's Qele Qele delivered by a young girl with a great beat and a memorable chorus, Finland's heavy metal band but with a bloody good song, Latvia's pirates with a song that surely everyone wanted to join in with the "yo ho ho" bits... Turkey fielded a band also with an excellent song that I'm sure I'm going to listen to again and again.

And even the Ukraine had a great song - I think - I may have been a bit distracted by the lovely Ani Lorak to be honest... But indeed, who wouldn't be? Always a pleasure to have an excuse to feature a pretty girl! Could perhaps do with a bit of Harmony hairspray to keep that fly-away effect down a bit...?

So what will it take for the UK to win the competition again? Will we have to court friends in neighbouring countries? Will we have to move the islands to the Baltic? Should we give up having very little in the way of drama and ridiculous costumes? Nope, perhaps the UK should concentrate on allowing some decent songs into the final of the selection instead of chucking them all out before the public have a chance of voting on the crud that's left...

And finally - who couldn't love the Croatian entry of laid-back old geezers, accordians and wonderful song. They could have ditched the grumpy old octogenarian rapper though. ...and possibly the hitting of bottles filled to different levels of water...