Last Stop Gran Canaria!

8 March 2004. Today is our last day on the MV Carousel as she sails on the Atlantic Isles cruise around the Canary Islands. Today we are visiting Gran Canaria.

We dock in the large port of the island's capital, Las Palmas. Then we are on a morning excursion today so we get onto a coach which takes us for a look at the Sahara-like dunes at Maspalomas - or as we say; just like St Annes near Blackpool!

Then we have some free time at a wonderfully picturesque little resort called Mogan. It's an absolute delight with a colourful harbour, whitewashed buildings but with colours running in vertical and horizontal lines over their architectural features. The harbour is ringed with bars and restaurants and colorful tropical fish are playing over the rocks on the bed of the harbour.

This is one of the most beautiful resorts in Europe I think and all this without a great heritage of grand buildings to bring people to it. We were reluctant to get back on the coach at the end of our 45 minutes there.

We arrived back at Las Palmas to find an older two-funnel cruise ship moored in front of the Carousel.

We had lunch onboard and then decided to get off the ship again for the afternoon and walk into Las Palmas.

Las Palmas forms a peninsula and so by walking in a straight line from the port, in fifteen minutes we crossed from one coast to the other and found ourselves at this beach - Playa de las Canteras. We found a couple of people from our dinner table and spent a while chatting. A signpost was reading the temperature - 34 degrees! It was warm and we needed a drink. I could count up to five in Spanish and say "please" and "thank you" (and thanks to John Wayne "Where is the booty?"...) so we wandered into a shop and I asked for "Dos Coca-Cola por favor?" feeling ridiculously pleased with myself until a stream of unintelligable Spanish came back at me. We were in a Burger King and Coke came in three sizes...

The Carousel was our first taste of cruising and we were undoubtedly hooked! Since that first cruise in 2004 we have cruised every year, looking on it as a great way to wake up in a different place every day, have a choice of going looking at places or relaxing on the ship and with all food free of charge, it's not as expensive an option as many think.

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The Midnight Gala Buffet

7 March 2004. The Carousel has sailed from La Palma and is heading now for Gran Canaria for our last day of the cruise.

Tonight, though is a special night for it is the night of the Gala Buffet.

For many people, the food is one of the main reasons for taking a cruise. I can confirm it is absolutely wonderful and with as much choice as you could reasonably expect.

The presentation, though - especially for these late night special buffets - is just spectacular. We didn't actually eat any of this, although it was available for eating after a half hour preview for passengers to take photos. But the care and attention that has gone into this lucious spread can be guessed at from these photos. Enjoy!

Chicken Liver Pate

Beef Platter

Ham Platter

Fish Platter

Chicken Platter

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Traumatic Time at the Vet's

No, not for the cat... For me.

Tigger has had a urinary tract problem. It started last year around this time and she was really bad then - we thought for a while we might lose her, but she recovered and we knew this time to spot the early symptoms and to get her to the vet's for a couple of injections.

Last night we took her for the second one and they were running a bit late with a place full of dogs. Tigger was safe enough (or should that be, the dogs were safe enough?) but she straight away started a continuous growling and yeowling and the dogs started to get nervous...

Which is ok, except that I am slightly allergic to dogs. We were there over half an hour and when I came out my eyes were sore.

By the time I had driven home my eyes looked like this!

I had to spend the night flat on my back with two cotton pads soaked in cold water over my eyes. I put my headphones on and just listened to music. Fran kicked me a couple of times claiming I was snoring but seriously – how could I have been when I was listening to music?!?

Anyway this morning the swelling has gone down a lot but I think I might find some things to do that don't require a lot of staring at the computer screen!

And Tig is so pleased to be home she's cuddling her brother, Jess, which he is suffering without complaint...

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A Day on La Palma

7 March 2004. Santa Cruz de la Palma is the capital city and port of La Palma, one of the westernmost of the Canary Islands. It is to this teardrop shaped island that we have sailed overnight.

Fran woke first and said "Have we docked yet?" I admitted I didn't know and she whisked back the curtains on the cabin porthole then shrieked at the sight of a much taken aback harbour pilot who was standing on the deck of his pilot boat about three feet away from her naked self... He could probably only see her face and shoulders but since that day Fran has been careful how she looks out of a ship window first thing of a morning...

By the time we were dressed and up on deck, the sun was out and blazing merrily down at the cruisers onboard, who by now are various shades of pink to bright-red-with-blisters... The bodies beautiful are still hard to find amongst the bodies crinkly.

We are booked on a half day afternoon excursion, so it is a lazy morning sunning ourselves and reading. Here Fran has gone for a couple of glasses of iced water - hopefully a bit fresher than the harbour water below which has a trail of rather disgusting looking stuff which has floated our way from a cargo ship moored at the other end of the dock...

The crew are playing on the lifeboats. This is described as a drill and is no doubt serious stuff, but it still looks good fun! Ok! The morning has gone and we must stir ourselves for the afternoon coach trip.

Our first stop is at a ceramics studio, where this chap is taking a break from making hundreds of little pirates - and one big one, obviously, to make a bowl in the manner of the ancient indiginous inhabitants of La Palma. As it's a volcanic island, I'm not sure how it could have indiginous anything except lava flows, but perhaps they mean the first ones to land after the fire went out...

Our next stop is at a local vineyard where the courier helpfully described the paint thinners posing as red wine as "not quite full bodied..." I should say not and to avoid litigation have avoided posting any photographs of the location or the grapes which the local goblins fill with vinegar every night.

Moving swiftly on, we arrive at one of the island's volcanic craters. The volcano, San Antonio last erupted in 1677 and was peaceful as far as any fire and brimstone was concerned.

The wind though was unbelievably fierce, threatening either to blow us into the crater or down the side of the volcano into the sea far below.

This was the view looking away from the bowl of the crater and either side, it was a heck of a long way to be rolling down razor sharp volcanic rock! Not a bad place though to tip any wine you may have bought without tasting it...

Final stop was at a small village with a small park laid out with mosaics and stone patterns. La Glorieta was the name of the park and admission was free and (Oh no!!!) there was a wine museum just 100 meters away.

It was extremely hot. Hot enough that you'd think the volcano could have rekindled itself, but we got back to the Carousel without any mishap or seismic phenomena. Tonight will be special and not just for the harbour pilot... Apart from breakfast, elevenses, lunch, afternoon tea, and main dinner, there is a midnight feast! Not to be missed!

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Have Some Madeira M'Dear

6 March 2004. We are on deck in time to watch as the Carousel sails into a misty harbour at Funchal, the capital of Madeira.

"It will burn off," I said confidently as we saw a pale sun through the mist. However it was not mist but dust, blown from the Sahara and it stayed pretty much all day. We were doing a sight-seeing tour by coach and some of the sights were a bit hazy! We went to the 3rd highest sea cliff in the world, but due to the "mist" we couldn't see the sea at the bottom...

As we went up and down the valleys, the mist got a little thinner and the sea kept coming into view and there was some lovely scenery. The houses were mostly large and well kept.

This is Riberia Bravo, a village on the West coast of Madeira.

Our guide had mentioned the crystal chandeliers in the church which were a donation from a rich couple.

Bits of interest caught my eye as we wandered around the village for half an hour. Bags and purses with incredibly detailed beadwork. Bits of moss hanging from balconies, like Spanish Moss hanging from trees in Florida. Then at the next stop of Porto Moniz, a swimming pool on the edge of the sea, which the waves, crashing onto the rocks beneath, reared up to fill until it was overflowing and almost part of the sea itself.

We are all starting to think about lunch - which is a local fish delicacy. The fish is a deep sea black fish reputedly extremely ugly to see but it was very tasty! The scenery near the restaurant was spectacular too with tall mountains jutting up at steep angles as seen in my photo.

As the coach made its way in a figure of eight route back to Funchal we stopped on a mountain peak from where it was possible to see both north and south coasts. Unfortunately the dust from the Sahara had formed a mist again and it was all we could do to see the next mountains in the range...

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A Life on the Ocean Wave

5 March 2004. A day at sea as the cruise ship Carousel sails from Agadir in Morocco towards Madeira.

We start the day with a good breakfast - we need the energy to walk 5 times round the crowded Promenade Deck to complete a mile. Oh... er... well, not so crowded then...

Then we spend much of the day lazing on the Pool Deck. The weather is gorgeous and the sunbeds are fully loaded with the bodies gorgeous - not so easily spotted amongst the bodies bloated... I kept mine covered - the world is not ready for that to be unleashed!

The Entertainments Crew kept us all amused with more silly competitions - this being the Duckathon... No I can't remember the details, but it was something along the lines of the plastic ducks having to be rescued from the pool and deposited somewhere against the clock and the one who rescued most was the winner. Something like that.

I had my nose in my book most of the day - Bill Bryson's The Life and Times of the Thunderbolt Kid and (according to Fran) a steady stream of snorts of laughter issued from me embarrassing her no end... I'm sure she exaggerates... At one point two pods of dolphins passed the ship all leaping in unison, around 60 of them altogether - a wonderful sight. Later another couple flashed at extreme speed right under my nose as I looked down the side of the ship at the sea. It spoiled us - I've never seen as many again on a cruise - in fact on the last two cruises we did we didn't see any at all.

In the afternoon one of the chefs came out to carve fruit into animals. Good entertaining stuff on a cruise ship - didn't impress Simon Cowell much on Britain's Got Talent a couple of months ago, but on a lazy day on a cruise ship you just go with the flow!

As the ship was at sea, the casino and all the shops were open. We had a wander around the ship and Fran got rid of a tenner's worth of tokens on the fruit machines in a most efficient manner! Join us soon for tomorrow's trip to Madeira!

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Ships and Boats Index

Culture Clash at the Kasbah!

4 March 2004. Tour time in Agadir, Morocco. We were on a half-day city tour having spent the morning on the ship. The tour included a trip to the Kasbah and a botanical garden and a souk - market.

We were warned that the locals would not take no for an answer and that anyone who walked next to you talking would expect payment for acting as a guide whether invited or encouraged or not.

The reality was even more in-your-face. Fran had the baby goat more or less thrown at her and instinct made her catch the poor thing. Both locals wanted paying for this photo! I had to wonder how they could stand wearing all those layers in that heat!!!

Others were even more unlucky though. One woman who wandered away from her husband was grabbed and lifted onto the back of a camel despite her protests. The camel was then raised to its feet and carried her off several hundred yards and the equivalent of 30 pounds charged to bring her back! It was all a bit of a revelation!

The souk was interesting but you were just never let alone for a second. Stall holders would physically pull you into a shop. There was some brilliant stuff there though - the wooden box looking like two books sandwiching vertical blocks of wood was a "magic box" with intricate sliding panels and hidden mechanisms to first find a key and then uncover the keyhole to open it. But although half the tourists would have bought one had it just had a reasonable price on it, none of us were into all the palaver of bargaining and bartering that was involved to buy one. A true culture clash!

The young lad in the background of this shop came over to tell me I had a nice smile and I got a laugh when I immediately offered "you can have a photo - five euros..."

Several of the group were feeling uncomfortable in the large souk and we ended up in a huddle with several armed police watching over us until it was time for the guide to come back with the coach.

This then took us to a beach area thronging with more jewellery salesmen - genuine fake watches etc - and a good view of the remains of the Kasbah up on the hill. Spoiling this vista of exotic Morocco was a MacDonalds, all bright red plastic, a hideous chunk of America plonked in the middle of African culture with no concession to its surroundings. Not sure what food was being served - MacDonalds may not try to fit in with the local aesthetics, but they do serve locally acceptable cuisine and that (had we been tempted to try it) may have been another culture shock!

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Wharles the Heck Are We?

Last night we played a Steam Fair in Wharles, which is an area out in the Fylde countryside between Kirkham and the M55 motorway.

It was one of those all too familiar bewildering happenings.

We had a phone call from Jack, who does the steam fairs out at Chorley and he had told us it was Saturday night in Treales (which is an area out in the Fylde countryside between Kirkham and Wharles...)

Then David got a call to say it was Friday in Wharles and thought we wouldn't be able to do it because I was due to be working in Plymouth on Friday. However, having turned it down with the organisers, he phoned Fran on Thursday night and she was able to tell him I was on my way home (from Hertfordshire) because the event in Plymouth had been cancelled. (Following this ok?)

We loaded the car for the last time - I've swapped it in today for a new Mazda - and followed the SatNav as we weren't really sure where Wharles was.

It took us down a road labelled as a dead end, but we figured that as we were in a field it could well be correct. The road tuened into a track and the track turned eventually into ruts and potholes and after a mile and a half with 3/4 of a mile still to go the surface was getting me worried about the bottom of the car and I had to reverse a mile before we could turn round to go through Kirkham to get to it on surfaced roads. The SatNav woman refused to apologise and kept trying to make me turn back to try again...

"Turn around when possible" kept being met with a chorus of "P*** off"

Anyway, we found it in the end and had a great night with a smallish but enthusiastic crowd. It went pitch black outside. Going to the loo was a painful experience for one member of the audience as he walked into a 3-foot high metal pole that had been erected to mark out a pitch.

Fran was gingerly coming back from a visit, feeling the way cautiously in the dark when someone came out of the disabled loo and banged the door just behind her. "I'm gobsmacked you didn't hear me scream, I jumped out of my skin!" she said.

So to the garage who took my Mondeo in part exchange, I'm sorry about all the mud caked all over it...

Large versions of the photos: the band, car boot load (labelled)

Chilling on the Carousel

3 March 2004. We had joined the Carousel as she set off for a cruise around the Canary Islands. This being our first day on a ship, we decided to ignore the delights of Lanzarote and stay on the ship.

Here the ship is coming into the port in Lanzarote. This is as much notice as we took. Sorry Lanzarote - we'll have another proper look at you next year in 2005!

There was a lot to experience on board the ship in fact. Breakfast, which we took on deck al fresco. Buffet style and lots of choice. Scrummy. Following which we explored the ship.

This is the Promenade Deck - an unbroken full circuit of the ship. Walking 5 times around it meant you had walked a mile. We did. We were on our own...

11:00 am. Elevenses were being served. Freshly made biscuits and coffee. Then a chance to sit on the deck, soak up a bit of sun and read. I was reading Bernard Cornwell's Heretic.

Lunch time. We stuck to a light lunch - salad and fruit. No sense in scoffing everything in sight! Besides at 4:00 pm it was Afternoon Tea. Sandwiches with the crusts cut off and (ooh!) bananas and custard!!!

During the afternoon there was lots to laugh at as the entertainments team made up lots of competitions between passengers and crew and there was some sort of demonstration each afternoon - ice carving, fruit carving, towel and napkin origami, cocktail juggling...

There was a formal dinner and we dressed up to meet the ship's Captain.

We had a photo taken in front of a screen backdrop of the staircase from the Titanic... er... hang on... why would a ship want to remind its passengers of one of the worst maritime disasters? Answer: because to most people it's a film, not a tragedy and therefore it's Leonardo's great romance with Kate Winslet rather than all those frozen floating bodies.

Evening meals on such a small ship were with the same table of people every night. It made for a jolly time as we got to know each other during the week.

Tomorrow we arrive in Africa - Morocco to be more precise and the port of Agadir to be specific. Until then, there's a Midnight Snack...

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Riding the Carousel on the Atlantic

2 March 2004. We fly from Manchester to Santa Cruz, on Tenerife to join the cruise ship MS Carousel.

Having been up all night we weren't totally with it at this stage... Which is why this photo of the ship was taken later in the week. Sharp eyed readers may have recognised that the photo was taken in Agadir, Morocco, rather than Tenerife!

So here starts the story of our first cruise, taken to celebrate my 50th birthday. The Carousel was the smallest of the cruise ships we have subsequently travelled on and therefore was the one on which we felt most seasick... Fran missed her food on the first night through not feeling well. Others ate theirs and then I spent the rest of the evening trying to ensure they missed me...

Our cabin was low down - if this had been Titannic then we were behind that locked grill door...! We were on B Deck - the lowest row of portholes seen on the ship in the photo above.

Open air was reached by the time you climbed to Deck 7, which was where the pool was. So quite a small ship. But to us at the time, being our first experience of cruising, it was large and exciting and we couldn't wait to get going!

One of our favourite spots on the pool deck with a sea view yet sheltered from the wind. Great for reading and spotting the sea life.

"Seals!" yelled the excited announcer on the mic during our full day at sea. "Seals down the starboard side!" Everyone dashed over to have a look but couldn't find anything. "Can you not see them?" he asked... "Round every window! Window seals!"

We did spot dolphins a few times on this cruise though, with one excellent sighting being two large pods of 30 or more dolphins swimming alongside the ship, one near, one a hundred yards away, leaping out of the water in graceful curves as they kept pace with the ship for a while.

Hold tight for further entries - we are to visit Morocco, Madeira, La Palma and Gran Canaria. Neither Sun Cruises nor the MS Carousel are still operating.

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Telly Watching

Almost halfway through the year and time for a list entry. 15 of the things I've watched on TV so far this year: -

I'm a sucker for the BBC's documentaries. Anyone who knocks the BBC or begrudges the license fee obviously don't watch their documentaries. Far better than the boring talking heads and endlessly repeated 3 action shots of their rivals, the photography is stunning (especially in HD) and the commentaries well presented.

Pixar do it again with this one borrowing a little from Conan Doyle's The Lost World and making a hero of a crotchetty old man.

Another BBC documentary series, stunning - will watch the repeats when they come round!

A super hero movie but just a touch dark this one. There's some seriously disturbed characters in this team and for me it showed the difference again between Marvel and DC comics. This one, based on DC leaves you wondering what special powers some of them had and why and how in particular one character's mask shifts and changes, yet once unmasked his face is perfectly normal... details, folks, details...

From the Marvel stable comes this one - talking of unstable characters... The Punisher isn't one of my favourite Marvel comics and I really only know him from his appearance in the Spider-Man and other series, but Ray Stevenson gives him the same character as he gave Pullo in HBO's Rome - violence first and ... well, not a lot after to be honest...

The cinema isn't always to be trusted with history, but this was an enjoyable piece of fluff as long as you keep that in mind.

I enjoyed this series which played out over ten weeks on Sky. Gritty, realistic and based on the real-life exploits of American Marines in the Pacific during the Second World War.

I never cease to wonder at the Americans' willingness to portray themselves as morons, particularly those supposed to be leaders, but forget that - the effects are to be savoured here and if you can ignore the fact that huge chunks of rock float in the sky, but water on them falls over the sides as waterfalls, then it's a visual feast and a decent yarn!

Die Hard as a comedy! Better than The Punisher!

Anyone who lived during the mid to late 1960s must surely love this film for its soundtrack alone. But the antics of the DJs (most of whom you can immediately identify as a real DJ of the time) are wonderful and it's funny, witty and poignant all at the same time.

One of the US unfunny "comedies". But it does have a rear view of a naked Aniston which just about managed to wake me up for a few seconds...

Our answer to America's willingess to portray its leaders as morons... We have real ones! I started calling this "Britain's Got Morons" only about two weeks in and it proved it week after week... Whether they are all in the contestants or in the voting public who voted for precosious kids and dogs doing parlour tricks, or in Piers and Amanda who voted through some of the most appalling singers ever to (dis)grace a stage I'm not sure.

From the Dreamworks stable, this was good! A young woman gets hit by a meteorite and as a result grows to gigantic stature and finds herself impounded by the military along with other freaks and results of scientific experiment and saves the day when aliens threaten the Earth. Favourite bit was the blue blob doing the Steve McQueen bit with a ball in his pen!

This probably should have come further up the list to be in chronological order, but was a repeat anyway! The Top Gear team in a challenge that must seriously have been a challenge. A superb extended special, filled with good fun, boyish humour and the odd spot of real danger.

Whilst loving fantasy as a genre, I've always found Terry Pratchett books quite hard to get into. This TV adaptation though, was excellent and I thoroughly enjoyed it, all the improbable characters and situations added up to a brilliant romp through the Pratchett world.

Wonder what July - December will bring...?